Identity

The identity of a human or what defines us. Is it what we really do or what we really learn .. is it these stories we leave untold or the stories we live and dream about. I was thinking about identity few days ago and what came to my mind is that old story that i still can remember and can relate much to the topic title which is "Identity".

Back in 5th primary stage, we had a library class and what the teacher decided to do is to make an open discussion and the discussion was about 1 question "Do you think your mothers shall go to work or just stay home?" and the question was left open for discussion, at my age back then all i could do is just observe how kids reacted to the question. And after the discussion ended i noticed that the kids that supported the mothers case to go to work was those who had their mothers work .. and similarly those whom their mothers didn't work, didn't support the case.

When i remembered this example i started to realize that the major changes in any one's life is based on those who teach them and these surrounding environment and events that takes place in their life. Which leaves me more confused with an open ended question .. then what makes us and what defines us .. in other words what gives us our identity?

Kids' story

One of the things i really enjoy while running in the club is watching the small kids playing whether in the playground or in the kinder garden area ... it's always beautiful to see how these kids act and react to you passing through them.

But today i stopped by a bunch of kids something like primary school kids and they seemed to be having a fight and i was really interested in hearing the conversation.

Kid X : أنا خلاص مش عايز أكلمك تانى

Kid Y : وانتا فاكر نفسك مين انا مش هكلمك تانى

Kid X: مش هتكلمنى تانى طيب ابقى شوف مين هيصاحبك اصلا

Kid X & Z: يلا نمشى ونسيبه لوحده كده

The funny thing is that when we grow up we forget our kidish nature i wonder if that's a good thing or a bad thing i mean we all have arguments with each other but we don't say the words we want to say to each other, deep inside us we talk like (kid X Y Z) but we don't show it we just keep hiding .. i still believe in a matter of days things will go fine with (kid X Y Z) cause at the end they know why they fought for at first place.

The beautiful thing about children is that they're so simple and they're so HUMAN in what the word means .. they jump when they want to jump they cry when they feel bad and they run when they want to run ... they smile when you pass through them and they keep walking around trying to discover the weird neighborhood in the club, but as they grow up they keep walking around more often trying to discover the weird mysteries of life.

رقم جلوس

Today was the last written exam in my college and i was just staring at this tiny paper on the desk and i realized that this is my bench number .. after a little while of flying away with memories i went back to my primary school days.

In primary school, we used to have a really weird habit .. we used to tear apart the bench numbers or as we call it رقم الجلوس and throw them away after the last year exam singing the unforgettable song  لا مذاكرة بعد اليوم فلعب الكورا اهم اهم there used to be a magical feeling by doing that, this old habit really used to mark the end of our examination i used to see the happy kids running in the school laughing that the exams are over. Life went on and we continued this habit i guess till secondary stage.

In 2nd secondary stage we were given that big red رقم جلوس and after 2nd year stage final exam i was really excited and i wanted to do the holy action of tearing رقم الجلوس apart and throwing it away but i remembered that i'll use the same bench number for next year so i was forced not to do so.

In 3rd year came the time to take my revenge and there was nothing to prevent me from tearing it apart but something stopped me i actually looked at it and couldn't tear it, i just took it and put it in my pocket i don't know why but maybe at this moment i realized that this is all that's left from this stage of my life .. it's that little red paper with all its memories, till today i still keep my رقم الجلوس of secondary stage and yes that's all what's left from that period of my life.

Today i kept starring at my bench number and i couldn't tear it apart as well but all i did is what you see in the attached picture to this post, in college you share a bench number with 4 other students so actually you can't tear it ... all i could do is take a picture of it and as many things i think in life that come and go that we may miss or not miss the only thing that remain is these unforgettable memories left in the form of pictures papers and sometimes in the form of a رقم جلوس

The Dawn

As we pass through the night

we'll always wait for the dawn

and when the dawn comes

we'll wait for the night once more

Just for history (My old blog)

Just for history or in case i even forget the URL this is my Blog .. My first blog i was passing through its posts and it really made me smile.

A STar'S Dream

Rachel Corrie

I'm here because i care.. i won't get into political details and it's my first time to really feel sad for Rachel that much, i believe the whole world lost a dreamer one of those who could have changed our world to a better place.

Rachel Corrie Lived and Died for the sake of her dream ... ever since a little child she dreamed of a better world for us all ..she didn't give up nor surrender till the day she died. She reminds me much of the movie "Pay it forward" when the little kid die .. in his pursuit to change the world .. but in the end of the movie you discover that people can come and go but their dreams and hopes can live forever.

This speech shows us the passion and the trueness of that young kid .. she walked her talk and left a legacy and some traces for people like us to carry on her dream. Hopefully one day her dream will come true.

may your soul RIP Rachel Corrie

More

" What if the world needs more? " I don't know really i just can't understand why i keep repeating these words in my head .. they're not from a movie or even a song but i keep repeating them all day long. those words are "What if the world needs more? " and i really don't know what the world needs from me at first place then why would it even need more.

Does it need more love or maybe more dreams or maybe more passion about what am doing .. or maybe it want more faith and belief .. maybe it needs more of my time and effort .. maybe it needs more achievements and glory .. maybe more friends to hang out with .. maybe more money .. i obviously don't know "What does the world even needs from me? ".

I just really don't know why these words are stuck in my head in such a way .. but maybe the only obvious thing is that the world just needs more from me.

Tobias Mead

His father wanted him to be a football player .. his family started to step away from him because he told them he wants to be a professional dancer.

quoting from his twitter account

Bio: lives to dance, dance to live!

Same old story

It's always been the same

killers live and others die

some say truth and others lie

murder in-front of our eyes

and we don't seem to even try

it's always been the same

same old story

Batman Quote (1)

Bruce Wayne: Well today I found out what Batman can't do.

He can't endure this. Today you get to say "I told you so."

Alfred Pennyworth: Today, I don't want to.

[pauses for several moments]

Alfred Pennyworth: But I did bloody tell you.

Michael Jackson - This is It

Janey Cutler

When they asked Britain's got talent contestant Janey Cutler who's 80 years old after Wowing the judges with her amazing voice .. "How many years have you waited to do that?" .. she smiled and said am just thankful to be here tonight.

and am just thankful to be here tonight as well

عم فوزى بتاع زمان

Not neglecting the fact that am studying Fuzyy Logic these days and the name of the subjects and the fun comments about it led me to remember this part of my life and specially that old person عم فوزى.

When i used to be a little kid i used to buy stationary stuff i need for school from an old stationary store down my home and it was run by a really old man named عم فوزى , whenever i used to enter he used to smile and he was always helpful you know the old people بتوع زمان and he was always cheerful and helping me out in choosing the stuff .. his friendly attitude with everyone around him made his old small stationary survive even after the arrival of the big stationaries in the neighborhood .. i remember even during summer visiting his stationary to buy kids comics and some other stuff and i never thought about going somewhere else.

Many years ago we found the old stationary closed for a long time and sadly they told us that  عم فوزى passed away and since that day that old stationary shop is closed and nothing has replaced it .. whenever i pass by it i just remember that old cheerful guy.

It's all part of our lives the comes and the goes and people like عم فوزى left their legacy in life for people like me and all those who bought from his stationary to remember him and pray for him.

may your soul RIP عم فوزى

Crazy

And those crazy thoughts

as crazy as a million dreams

crazy life of birds in the sky

and nothing is as crazy as it seems

crazy little ants crossing the street

as crazy as friends that come and go

and nothing but ...

crazy starts and much crazier ends

And those crazy moments

as crazy as sparkling stars

easy to see .. way too far

and nothing remains but their simple glow

And those crazy thoughts in my head

as crazy as a million dreams

people keep calling them crazy

seem so much real to me

The Last College Lecture

The Last lecture , whenever i hear this word i remember the best presentation ever given by Randy Paush declaring that this is his last lecture, After discovering his killing cancer disease . He made a lecture which in my opinion can be described as one of the most inspiring lectures in history, ever since i saw this lecture my whole perspective towards life has changed.

Today at this moment am attending the last college lecture isA. The only common thing between Randy's lecture and this lecture is the ringing name "The last lecture" and the fact that after this lecture many changes will take place in our lives just like Randy's "last lecture" changed the lives of many people.

Control Lecture 13-5-2010